sex addict dating

If you're romantically involved with a current or former drug addict, just know it's not all bad. Dating a drug addict, as with dating anyone, comes with pros and cons.

Most sex addicts, if they had past relationships, had relationships that were damaged by their addiction.  The addict typically leads a double life and uses dishonesty and self delusion to escape the feelings of shame and guilt toward a spouse or partner.

When I was 14, I had my first boyfriend, and my sex addiction took on a new, more physical form. We groped one another under the blankets; I performed clumsy oral sex. I felt that I found my duty. I was now like the big-breasted women on the tapes: I finally had a boy at my feet, and it was sex that was keeping him under my newfound power. I learned that sex equaled love, and as long as I was willing to give it, I wouldn’t be alone.

All relationships require hard work and conscious attention. It may seem like taking on a relationship with a recovering addict would require far too much work or attention, but when a person has taken her recovery seriously and has spent time truly working on the issues behind the addiction, she may have a head start. After all, it is the quality of the relationship we have with ourselves that determines how well we do in relationship to others. So while it may seem counterintuitive or even just plain risky to imagine entering into or remain in a relationship with a sex addict, there are plenty of reasons recovering sex addicts can and do make excellent partners:

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When I was 14, I had my first boyfriend, and my sex addiction took on a new, more physical form. We groped one another under the blankets; I performed clumsy oral sex. I felt that I found my duty. I was now like the big-breasted women on the tapes: I finally had a boy at my feet, and it was sex that was keeping him under my newfound power. I learned that sex equaled love, and as long as I was willing to give it, I wouldn’t be alone.